Firestar Hates Nyan Cat
by Of Forgotten Rain
Summary: In fact, he could come up with at least four reasons why. [WARNING: TROLL-FIC — contains Firestar yelling after Nyan Cat and pooping rainbows.] (Silverclan challenge)


**[Firestar Hates Nyan Cat]**

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(Silverclan challenge — The Brightest Day)

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By: Of Forgotten Rain (P.S. I don't own Warriors or Nyan Cat or rainbows)

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Reason #1: How It Stole His Waffles

Firestar, leader of ThunderClan, was strolling quietly through the forest which covered his territory when he saw _it_. His bright green eyes widened as he glanced up at the night sky.

Then they sparkled.

"DOUBLE RAINBOW!"

He chased the rainbow and wanted to find the end of it, maybe to find a pot of catnip or something. But he found something better. So much better. It was golden, and it looked delicious…

"GIMME MY WAFFLES!" Firestar sped toward the pile of perfect, golden waffles, his mouth watering as he stared at the delicious food.

But as he bounded and skidded to a halt at last, panting heavily, he realized the thing that was making the rainbow had flown down and snatched his waffles before he could get to them.

It looked like a cat.

And looked like a biscuit.

It was pooping out the rainbow.

But most importantly, it stole his waffles.

"What the - is _that_?" Firestar yelled. He leaped up with a strong push of his hind legs and suddenly grew wings, then caught the cat/biscuit/rainbow-pooper in his paws.

"Who are you and why're you messing with my waffles?!" shouted the ginger tabby cat with a loud growl, his green eyes flaming with anger. "MY WAFFLE! MY WAFFLE! MY WAFFLE!"

The tiny little biscuit kitty hovered in front of Firestar's face and took a deep, slow breath. Firestar widened his eyes, his ears pricked up, staring at the little colorful cat, waiting for it to speak.

Then it spoke.

"NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN!"

Then it flew away.

Firestar's eye twitched.

"SCREW YOU!"

{_firestarhatesnyancat}_

Reason #2: How It Disturbed His Nap

Firestar laid in the leader's den, splayed out on the cool, cool ground. It was his day off and his deputy had taken over for him. He had nothing to worry about in the clan. A warm and gentle greenleaf breeze ruffled the lush, green leaves and made the grass dance. Even the sun's beams seemed cheerful as they washed over the clan in a comforting, golden glow. And without a doubt, this entire day was going to be totally, utterly, completely per—

"NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN!"

Firestar's ear twitched and suddenly he sat bolt-upright. Sighing in frustration, he padded out of his own, spacious den and glanced up at the blindingly bright sky.

"Whoever disturbed my beauty nap, you're so gonna—"

Then a little shadow blocked the sun and Firestar squinted against the white and golden rays.

"NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN!"

Firestar's eyes narrowed into slits. He growled and pointed (somehow) while he yelled, "How dare you show your edible self to me again!"

The Nyan Cat stopped in its tracks. It looked down. Firestar looked up. They had a heated stare-down.

Then the little cat stuck its tongue out at him.

"Why, you little…!" Firestar ranted on, jumping all around and screaming to everyone, not even noticing that he had disturbed their moonhigh naps.

_{firestarhatesnyancat}_

Reason #3: How It Blocks The Stars At Night

A dark ginger tabby tom peeked out of the leader's den, swinging his head from side to side, then glancing up to the night sky.

No clanmates were awake.

No Nyan Cat in the sky.

He made a silent paw pump and quickly scampered out of his den to arrive at a clearing. A small hill there was, and a large boulder rested on the hill. He swiftly leaped onto the tall boulder and gazed up at the star.

"Finally!" he exclaimed, sighing happily. All those days that have been filled with…

"NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN!"

Well, they were over. The little flying biscuit was nowhere in sight.

"Bluestar, we can finally talk!" Firestar exclaimed into the clear, starry night. "Tell me the prophecy that's been—"

And then it happened.

Firestar saw a rainbow streak across the sky.

"Great StarClan, no."

"NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN!"

And it knocked Bluestar right out of the sky until she flew away and vanished with a small twinkle in the horizon.

"NO!" Firestar screamed, reaching a paw out as if he could catch the last ray of light that she held. "No, Bluestar!"

He spun around to face Nyan Cat, his expression fuming, then quickly hurried to the store and bought an axe.

He shrieked at the top of his lungs:

"I'LL KILL YOU!"

_{firestarhatesnyancat}_

Reason #4: How It Tastes So Good

Firestar was watching the sky when it suddenly hit him. If Nyan Cat really was a biscuit… then it was edible, right?

So there came the idea.

_I'm not really going to _eat_ it, am I? _Firestar hesitantly thought to himself. Then he thought of its annoyingly annoying antics, and agreed.

"Get ready, you waffle stealer!"

And when he saw that familiar rainbow streak by in the sky, he caught the cookie cat in his paws and literally took a bite out of its biscuit body. The tiny cat just flew away like nothing happened.

"It's actually…" Firestar murmured to himself, realizing as the sprinkles melted in his mouth. "It's actually pretty good!"

But then, he felt something wrong. Very wrong.

_{firestarhatesnyancat}_

Later those days, the cats in the clans would look up at the night sky, only to see a large cookie-like cat with a dark ginger tabby head and green eyes, a rainbow coming out of its butt as it flew.

"NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN!"

—Conclusion—

…Firestar really hates Nyan Cat.


End file.
